Monday, December 31, 2007

WAC predictions ... but for 2025

We are up for the challenge. However, some like to make predictions in late December about the coming new year and we will stick our necks out and go a few steps further -- such as what we see for the year 2025 in the WAC:

*** 37-year old Herb Pope is still awaiting word regarding his eligibility from the NCAA. New Mexico State Coach Reggie Theus Jr. said, "It should be just another day or two and we'll know something for sure. I'm confident Mr. Pope will play this season." To keep in shape, Pope has been playing for the Vatican City European team.

*** WAC Commissar Karl Benson on his recent 'nyet' to UCLA's request to join the WAC: "The fit just didn't seem right at this point. But North Texas State still has a standing invitation to join hands with us."

*** Utah State Coach Stew Morrill on the recent blurry photo in the Salt Lake City Tribune supposedly of him momentarily dancing a jig after a comeback last-second win against BYU in Logan: "It was just a doggone cramp but consider that our record is horrible, Northern Utah Valley State University won't play us because 'we're not a big enough draw,' my team reeks, I couldn't coach five Lebrons to a win right now, the players aren't performing up to their capabilities and we just might lose every game the rest of the season. Other than all that, things are peachy."

*** Sections of Moscow, Idaho were razed to the ground when Vandal fans and supporters got out of control and mayhem ensued after the Idaho State basketball team won two in a row. -- (yeah, yeah, we know it's a cheap shot)

*** The California State University regents announced that enough funding had been raised to resurrect Fresno State University. The school had been shuttered after payouts from various athletic department lawsuits had emptied the university till. Also, rumor has it that Dr. Phil has been hired as an advisor for all the men's sports and Oprah Winfrey for the same role on the women's side. On another note, FSU's mascot has been switched from the Bulldog to the Poodle in order to foster a kinder, gentler athletic department.

*** In a sad note, Jayvee Carroll, the son of Utah State's all-time scorer, failed to make the varsity squad at Logan High.

*** The San Jose State University football stadium has undergone a name change. New major donor Kirk Douglas requested it now be called Spartacus Stadium and the Athletic Department relented.

*** Legal scholars voiced concern in Idaho when the U.S. government filed a Title IX suit against Boise State University for gender discrimination. It seems that Boise State must now be known as Girlse State half the year.

Well, if you made it through all the above ... you defintely deserve to enjoy a happy New Year!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

25 years from now Reggie has been coaching at NMSU for 14 years. Upon his return to the Raggies he showed a newfound maturity and humbly announced, "No longer when we have a team down will we step on their necks. A simple titty twister is more than sufficient."

Jaycee Carroll, coach of USU, announces his teams schedule for the coming year. When asked why they aren't playing any teams in the top 100 RPI he insists he tried to schedule Duke, Kansas and North Carolina but they refuse to play the first game of a Home and Home in Logan. He than explained how difficult it will be to win vs Indiana-Fort Wayne, Coastal Carolina and Cal State Stanislaus and if that doesn't get his team to the tourney they should go back to the Big West.

The University of Nevada has announced that long time coach Mark Fox will be required to wear an ankle chain to keep him in the coaches box. The "Shock Collar" policy instituted last year will still be enforced. Each time he goes after a Ref, Karl Benson under the direction of an anger management professional will trigger the collar thus ensuring Fox does not violate the terms of his court ordered probation.